2013-04-05 - 9:54 p.m.

Reading over the old. I was a drunk in the day. Stalking prey. Haven't felt a feeling in ages. Walking around like Solomon Grundy; died on Saturday. The old ticker just stopped a'tickin' that day, the nails came last May. We were in the same place in '08, you and me. The only other person who still occasionally uses dland. You know who you is. Both of us were falling apart and oh so far away that we never knew. The skulls we could have cracked as a team in those days. Be back 'home' in a week or so, whatever home means to someone like me. Homeless and heartless. Tick-tock tick-tock. I have been stifled, stop stifling me world. Gone are the funny days, gone is the wild one, though in his defense he was just a defense. Someone help me remember what feelings feel like. The only thing I remember is angry. So angry for so long. Just hate. Maybe what they say is true, it burns you out inside. Whoops, too late now. I'm expected to be this person that I've never been before. Am I just that good a liar or am I the one being lied to? I spent too much of my life hanging with the smart kids, I don't know how to sit at that other table. I am not a genius despite the claims of my gallery of fools. Who thought it was a good idea to make me a boss? Swallow sadness, LIKE A BOSS. I think I shall read read read some more. Thy ramblings amuse me so, no offense meant, just that I can see the feels vicariously that I myself have forgotten how to feel. Write on valiant foolish poet.

The past is gone - Next song. Next song. Next!